Boobies, Casino's and big yachts

NICE

The weekend of the 11th of June saw 3 friends and I embarking on the most epic roadtrip of all. A glorious 7 hours in a little green car. The boot (or should I say Trunk to please my American friends?) was like Santa's black bag: things either spewing out or forced to take on irregular shapes. And Roadtrip food. Oh the roadtrip food. What is it with roadtrip food and it's seductive voice which forces one to eat almost everything in the first hour? Hmmmm now that I've finished all 3 sandwiches, what else can I eat?
To get to Nice, France from Lausanne, Switzerland we took the
Motorway to Martigny after we which we branched off to enter the St Bernard tunnel which connects Switzerland and Italy. If you are returning to Switzerland buy the Aller-Retour (valid 30 days) as there is a plus/minus 17 franc difference which will save you almost 20CHF on the way back (seeing as entering the tunnel via the Italian side costs more)
The glorious 7 hours consisted of one peebreak, old school music, loud girly singing and toothpicks to hold up our eyelids as we were forbidden to sleep.
Arriving in Nice at 2 in the morning and out comes Tom (our GPS Friend, who gets us lost most of the time anyway as he cannot seem to understand french roads) We EVENTUALLY found our Helvetique hotel - 24 hour book-in thank god. 18€ for parking!!! The price was cheaper than that of a regular hostel: this of course means one hell of a stinky room but a freindly night-concierge and of course being in Nice, we were oblivious. Warning: Morning staff are Douchebags!!

Clever Budget food: Long life milk, cereal, giant bowls of pre-made pasta salad, yoghurt.

SATURDAY:

Hello million dollar yachts, Hello grand Casino, Hello Mediterranean beaches.
After a not too late wake-up despite our 2AM bedtime, we walked to the train station bustop to catch the number 100 bus to Monaco. It was packed and stuffy and took almost 40 minutes of standing and swaying to and fro as our bus maneuvered the winding mountain roads on it's way to the second smallest country in the world.
Oh the glamour of the rich and the famous! I would give not even a penny to have to keep up with this snotty bunch. Excuuse me, but your yacht is bigger than mine - WA WA CRY CRY Anyone for some salmon sandwiches with a dollop of caviar. Bleh
But oh the buildings! Absolute beauty! Absolute Symmetry! Standing in front of the Monte Carlo Casino, I was quite shocked at how quaint and petite it was. Of course Size does not count right?
A quick run up the Kill-me steps to the Palais Royale sure was worth the view. There before you lies the cute little harbour that harbours the not quite so cute nor little yachts.
Monaco's Royal Palace, founded in the 12th century, is no Fancy Schmancy Castle with all them towering turrets. It looks more so like a little sandcastle built by giggling children, with extra odds and bits added on and of course a flag propped atop it's tallest bit. Of course being built by giggly children should in no way demean it's status as top-notch fortress. I wasn't able to check out the changing of the guard but if you're ever in Monaco before 11:55 get your bum over there and tell me if missed out. P.s the cannonballs are pretty cool!!
Heading back to Nice, we hit the cobbled streets for a bit o' shopping, during which blue slush-puppies were consumed resulting in horrific blue tongues which surely scared away the french boys that were supposed to fall maddly in love with us ;P Ha ha Of course we happened upon a bachelor party with a bachelor dressed up as a hooker for whom I had to put a condom on a cucumber - oh the French!!!
We got ourselves back to the hostel, only to change into our swimming suits and grab our Mailibu and coke. The sun only sets at like 9 in late spring so swimming was a totally normal thing to do; the only thing that made us look ridiculously "touristy" was our mad and loud totally conspicuous presence as we bounded into the waves like puppies.
The locals seem to like to hit the beach after work with a few drinks so the atmosphere was wonderful as well as the weather. There was a random display of fireworks which came from the "Private Opera Beach" which we Public beach-goers had the advantage of seeing from it's best viewpoint. Silly Rich people.
SUNDAY:
Okay last day, what to do? Of course we had limited time as we had to restart our beautiful 7 fooking hours in the car! So we spoilt ourselves and had Crépes at a side-street café and then hit the beach again and let's just say we got daring and tops were no longer existent. Hey, we were in the south of France - we couldn't NOT do it!!! The water was wonderfully warm and we, once again being the tourists that we were, not conspicuously at all(Sarcasm much?), waved our bathing suits in the air at one of our friends sitting on the beach cringing in shame. Good times
On our way out of nice we went for a quick look at the Russian Orthodox cathedral with it's candy coloured onion domes. Wonderfully different from all other western European cathedrals.

Commence 7 hour trip which turned into an even more attractive 9 hour trip due to intense bumper to bumper traffic heading towards Genova.
C'etait une trés bon week-end :)